AliThinks

Does This Mean I'm A Writer Now?

Because I'm sitting in a coffee shop with my laptop, enjoying some good java and some free wi-fi. 

Actually, that was a joke.  I am no more a writer today than I was yesterday.  Although I love to write -- and have been published, yay me! -- I cannot call myself a writer.  It just doesn't match how I feel about myself.  And to me, saying "I'm a writer" smacks of pretension unless you earn a living that way. 

But enough about me.  Let's talk about food. 

Just Call Me Molly

Or Scarlett.  Call me Scarlett (it's so much more modern).

Yesterday my lips were all sting-y and chapped.  I kept putting on different kinds of lip blam, but it wasn't doing much. 

This morning?  I woke up to swollen lips.  Can you say silicone injection?  I gave new meaning to the word "bee-stung."  I looked like Meg Ryan on a bad day. 

Now? My lips have, uh, subsided.  But BOY do they sting and burn.  And I think I'm going to have to let them heal their own way, sans lip blam. 

License?

The audio is not in sync with the video.  What's up with that?

New Rules

In lieu of a rant about my five minutes at the Department of Motor Vehicles this morning, I'll just post a few words and a photo.  Take from them what you will:

"We need this information by law.  I can only assume that 'prenom'* means 'name'."

"What if I told you my name was Alison. It says 'Alison' next to 'prénom'.  Can you understand it then?" 

"Again, I can only assume that's what it means."

So I have to have my French driver's license translated, even though on the front of it, underneath the words "Permis de Conduire," it says "Driving Licence" in English (and all the other official languages of the EU).

*She pronounced it "pree-nahm," of course. 

5000

Yesterday I wrote a blurb about this blog's soon-to-be 5000th comment, and promised a CD to whoever left it.

Late last night, Margaret won that CD by saying this.  When she told me she'd had a bad weekend in our e-mail exchange that followed, I was especially glad she had been the one to leave the landmark comment.

Here's to Margaret, and to all of you who read my thoughts.  I'm pretty sure I could blog without you all, but your feedback (and just knowing there are people out there who are interested in what I have to say) makes it that much better for me.  Thank you so much for reading, and for being there for me. 

Chocolate Espresso Beans

In a gumball machine at Common Grounds coffeeshop.  No, I didn't eat any. The coffee there was enough to get me wired this afternoon. 

Blurb

A while back I mentioned that my blog was coming up on some milestones.  One is imminent, and I've decided to kind of celebrate it.

Someone out there will leave my blog's 5000th comment, and whoever it is will receive a CD of tunes, handpicked by yours truly. 

And the other milestones?  I'll write about them when the time comes. 

Got The R.E.M. Going Through My Head

  Pilgrimage. Pilgrimage.
  The pilgrimage has gained momentum
  Take a turn, take a turn
  Take our fortune, take our fortune
  Take a turn, take a turn
  Take our fortune, take our fortune

I'm singing this because I was thinking of titling this entry "Pilgrimage."  We took a turn today -- off the interstates that intersect Cincinnati -- and went to both Trader Joe's AND Jungle Jim's.  And no, this has nothing to do with R.E.M.

And The Cashier Said...

"Are those artichokes?" 

The Stale Smell Of Bureaucracy

During my thirteen years in France, I dealt with bureaucracy on so many different levels it's not even funny.  Somehow in all my travails there, I absorbed the notion that the United States possesses a much more efficient system.

Okay, you can stop laughing now. 

This afternoon I spent approximately 40 minutes at the Social Security Office.  You see, I misplaced my card, which I need to produce in order to get a Kentucky driver's license.  It doesn't matter that I know the number and have never had to show the card for ANYTHING, EVER.  I have to prove to the DMV that I have a number. 

Another thing I have to show to the DMV -- and to Social Security -- is my birth certificate, as if my passport and my very being weren't proof enough that I'm a real live Ammurican.  I ordered the certificate online, and it arrived in yesterday's mail, so I thought I was good to go.  Today I took the needed documents to the Social Security office, so that I could get a new card, so that I can get a driver's license.  Following me? 

Well, the guy at Social Security didn't need the birth certificate after all.  My passport was enough.  But I'm getting ahead of myself.

I had to wait my turn, of course.  I had to take a number.  When I walked in the place (a big room full of chairs and four "windows"), I noticed the sign right in front of my face: PLEASE SIGN IN HERE.  YOU WILL BE CALLED BY YOUR NUMBER. 

Okaaaayy...Got my number and sat down.  And for ten minutes, no one was called.  Then, "N450, Window 2 please!"  I was N458. 

I was reminded of France, and the interminable waits at la préfecture, la sécu, l'Assedic, l'ANPE.  Take a number.  Sit and wait. 

More people came in to the office, and every.single.one of them strode right up to the first window to get their business done.  And every time, the employee would say "Have you signed in yet at the black kiosk over there?" 

It was almost closing time, so I imagine that the guy was yelling in his head "Did you NOT SEE THE HUGE MACHINE RIGHT IN FRONT OF YOU WHEN YOU WALKED IN THE DOOR!"  I know that with each new person, I was getting more tense and screaming progressively louder "You have to wait your turn! Why the fuck do you think we are ALL! SITTING! HERE!"  It sure wasn't because we wanted to watch The Guiding Light, although that might have been the reason for some, now that I think about it. 

I was rather close to all the windows, so I got to eavesdrop a little.  One woman was there with her young son; he needed a new card in order to get a photo ID.  I heard her ask, "Now, will he get a whole new number?"  My "Oh my GOD" was quite audible.  I hope people just thought I was being impatient. 

Speaking of stupid people...nah.  That'll be the subject of another blog entry. 

So I'm getting a new Social Security card.  As you may know, you're not supposed to carry your card on you, so I'll stick it in a drawer somewhere until the next time I need to show it, at which point I'll probably have to get a new one, because I'll have lost this one.  And so it goes. 

New adventures in bureaucracy on Monday, when I go to the Department of Motor Vehicles to get a driver's license. 

Am I Really About To Say This?

I heart cable TV.

Duvel

   

   
     Click image to enlarge.

Oh BOY!

Guess what? I'm going to the dentist in a few minutes! Yay! It's time for a checkup and cleaning, but mostly time for a cleaning. 

You see, French dentists just don't do that "polishing paste in the spinning rubber cup" thing. If you have bad tartar (which I don't), they'll use ultrasound to get it off your teeth. Otherwise, nothing. 

So basically, I haven't had my teeth cleaned in about 14 years. And you know, they're not all that yellow, so I'm wondering what they're going to look like when it's all said and done. 

The Long And Rambling Post

(insert McCartneyesque piano chords here)

First, a photo.  It's Self-Portrait Tuesday.  I took this last Friday, when I was feeling both introspective and a little down.  (I'm feeling better now, thank ya verah much).

Note to everyone who automatically assumes blonde hair = blue eyes:  look again.  Note to self: get a smaller nose stud already! 

Real Quick Like...

As of today I have lost 12 pounds, or about 5.5 kilos. 

Now I just need to get exercising; I need it as much for my mental health as for my physical state. 

The weather sucks, so walking isn't very appealing right now.  Today's the day I call that women-only-30-minute-workout place to inquire about costs. 

In Praise Of Toshiba

Yesterday Allan and I got new (matching) laptops. Yes, we are total freaks geeks.

This really is a big deal, because he was using a laptop with an external keyboard and mouse (my cat danced across the original keyboard with its little coffee-soaked paws), and I was using Allan's old Dell (now with Windows 98!). 

Now we can sit side by side in our Poang chairs and IM each other. (Dad, if you are reading this, we don't really do that). 

Shell-Shocked

Lately I've been out of sorts.  I am frustrated because there are things I want to do, and right now I just can't. I can't get it together, I can't concentrate, I can't stop my short attention span from being so short, I can't stop wishing my mind would just settle down.

Logic tells me this is all par for the course.  Hell, I just moved from one continent to another AND I took a leap of faith and left my children in the care of their father. (I don't mean to imply that he might not be capable.  He's more than capable.  I am talking about the distance between me and my kids).

I see other people doing things I would like to do, and I get frustrated because they have more or less succeeded where I have not.  The only thing I can say I'm really proud of is my children.  I guess I could also say that the people I'm feeling envious of don't have children, at least not that I know of.  But that's neither here nor there.  Children and ideal-achieving should not be antithetical.   

For years I have thought I would like to write -- not a novel, but articles and things like that.  There always seems to be something in the way.  First it was my juggling of three teaching jobs plus the care of two small children.  Then it was my quest for tenure.  After that, the lightning bolt of depression knocked me down. I got back up but then moved back to the States, after 13 years in France. 

To paraphrase Madeleine L'Engle, a writer doesn't find the time to write, she makes the time.  The factors I mentioned above left me with no energy!  Some friends have told me to just relax now.  It is hard for me to do so, even though I know that is what I need.  Hell, I blogged about the need to relax a couple of weeks ago. 

Even this entry is becoming disjointed.  My brain travels at warp speed except when I want it to.  I'd like to make a coherent point here! 

There are things I want to do.  Things I aspire to.  Things I wasn't able to do before, for whatever reason (or excuse, as some might say).  All the pieces are in place for me to create these things.

But I can't.  Not yet.  And I'm so frustrated.

Just A Small Town Girl...

Guess what I'm doing right now? 

I'm totally watching a Journey concert on VH-1 Classic. 

Only In Kentucky?

Les Petits Détails

Here's a partial list of things I've appreciated in the past few days. I need to keep a pen on me all the time.  I need to jot these ideas down as they come to me, because I have forgotten half of them. Did I mention that it's a partial list? And the forgetting? Did I mention the forgetting part? 

• The garbage disposal
• The spray nozzle in the sink
• The Food Network
• Smoke-free cafés
• Coffee-to-go
• The heated seats in the car
• Walking to the Post Office yesterday
• The ice and water dispensers in the fridge
• Automatic garage doors that don't have a flashing yellow light when you open them
• Right turns on red
• ...

Some of these things do exist in France, but they weren't part of the world I lived in. 

What are some of the little things that you've appreciated lately? What detail spoke to you, what made you smile, what were you thankful for?