Welcome To Smallville

So I'm finally painting that cheap wooden shelf that I "recuperated," as the French would say. 

And I ran out of paint.  I'd only bought a little tiny can, because I wasn't sure of the color.  But I like this color, framboise, and it's just a cheap wooden shelf, cheaper than IKEA, so it's not like I'm going to fuck up some really nice furniture with my raspberry paint. 

Running out of paint = going to Bricomarché. 

Bricomarché = next to Intermarché

Intermarché = grocery store for a small town

I needed a couple of things at the grocery store, including dental floss. 

There I was, in the toothpaste section of the cosmetics aisle, and I couldn't find any dental floss.  None. 

I scanned the shelves twice.  Three times.  Lots of denture pastes and creams, but NO FLOSS. 

But I know that the French know of the existence of dental floss.  I mean, I've bought some here before.  (Never mind that it has lasted me years because I always forget to floss.  27 days to create a habit, Alison.  27 days). 

I just kind of shook my head and figured I'd get some next time I went to the "metropolis" where I used to live. 

Then I stopped.  What if...(and I tried to make my brain run on French logic)...what if the floss was in that "first aid" section at the other end of the aisle?

If you've ever been in a French grocery store, you know what I mean.  You can't buy cough syrup or pain reliever anywhere but the pharmacy, but you can get foot powder, lip balm, disinfectant, bandages and gauze in the "parapharmacie" section of the supermarket.  And condoms.  You'll find condoms there, too, because you never know.  Isn't every good first aid kit stocked with condoms? 

I stopped checking out all the NEW! condom marketing strategies, and looked for floss.

Bingo. 

Unwaxed.  50 meters of unwaxed floss, right next to the toothpicks.  UNfuckingWAXED.  I tried not to have a heebeejeebee fit in the store, and decided that I have enough floss to get me through until I go back to the metropolis. 

Comments

[Allan]

:)

[BHD]

Regarding the flossing.

This is a little embarrassing, so don't share this with anyone. ANYONE!

I keep the covered floss tube where I can pick it up each morning on the way to my first stop after getting out of bed: the toilet. I'm going to be sitting for a while anyway, so why not floss?

I never, ever miss a day. No kidding. Even if I have a flu, I'll still floss, though the brushing might not get done. Now, if I can figure out a way to get the chore done in the evening...

[Alison]

I promise I won't tell anyone. ANYONE.

[BHD]

Thanks. I knew I could count on you. I'd hate for this to be blogged or anything...

[Amber]

Hehe BHD, I am going to tell EVERYONE!!

I almost never get away with shopping at just one store every week! OH! for a Walmart!

[Denise]

WalMart and Tar-zhay (aka Target) are the two Greatest Places in the World.

[Donna]

Whoa. Flossing on the toilet. That is the single most brilliant idea I've heard in a long while! Sorta strange, yes, but no worse than, say, reading Us Weekly or People on the can. I'm going to try it!

[Donna]

Whoa. Flossing on the toilet. That is the single most brilliant idea I've heard in a long while! Sorta strange, yes, but no worse than, say, reading Us Weekly or People on the can. I'm going to try it!